Being in love is agreeably one of the best feelings ever. You
want to be all over each other, kiss, hold hands, and make goo goo eyes at each
other! It’s okay for you to want everyone to see how much you both are crazily
in love with each other!
It’s cute to want to ‘break the internet’ with your love because
you might just be inspiring some couples in a ‘dry, we-are-just-there, chemistry-less’
relationship to want to spice up things and wake up all those tired bones lying
around in their dying relationship.
It’s agreeably oh-so-cute if you post pictures of you and your
bae on special occasions like your anniversary, his or her birthday etc. That’s
respectable, mature, and interesting. It also has its own little element of
surprise. It makes people curious and be like ‘oh, so y’all still together?!
How did you do it? What’s your secret?!’
Now, the real questions are; why are you actively involved in
SMDA? Are you simply happy and oh-so-in-love or are you feeling insecure? Are
you using it to spite anyone? Is SMDA making any great impact in your
relationship? How much of SMDA is too much? Does the whole social media users
need to know every detail about your relationship?
Public display of affection has been discovered to make some
observers feel uncomfortable and/or unhappy if they are not in a relationship.
I suppose we can call that jealousy in a sense! That harmless jealousy gradually
turns to envy and then that envy automatically turns to hatred (all thanks to
your continuous, excessive SMDA) and then they start praying (and sometimes
plotting) for you and your bae to break up!
It has also been discovered that people sometimes use SMDA as a
possessive tool or as a way of marking their territory whenever insecurity
rears its incredibly ugly head in their relationship. So as to get assurances
(which don’t last) from people’s comments, they start uploading their loved up
pictures online. Trust them ‘kodenu-oju-aye-ni-mon-se amebos’ to post
sugar-coated comments like ‘oh, you are so cute together’ comments on the
pictures. These comments in turn makes you feel partially reassured that you
and your partner are still getting it right! But is that the solution? Why not
put SMDA aside and sort things out with your partner? You don’t need social
media’s approval that things are great in your relationship, you need your
partner’s assurance!
You are going through a rough time with your partner or you both
just had a fight and instead of ironing it out with him or her face-to-face,
you decided to post about it online! For what exactly? Why? Is it to gain his
or her attention or to get sympathy from people? You’d think posting about it
will resolve the differences. Sorry sweetheart, it won’t! Not only will the
world know that your love life is in a mess (trust some people to rejoice over
that!) but your partner is also bound to lose respect for you.
One interestingly funny thing is that, some baes (most
especially ladies) believe that if their partner does not upload their pictures
and post status updates about them on social media, then they don’t truly love
them! There’s this friend of mine who used to nag and whine at her bae that he
refused to upload her pictures on his social media handles because he wasn’t
really in love and proud of her. The guy would sigh deeply and stare at her as
if she was incredibly stupid. Just because your boo doesn’t post your pictures
on social media doesn’t mean that he or she does not love you enough.
Now, I’m not saying that social media display of affection is
totally bad. All I’m saying is that ‘too much of anything is bad! Know when too
much is too much. Know when to leave when the ovation is loudest. The whole social
media doesn’t have to know everything about your relationship. That will spoil
the fun!
I saw a quote somewhere that says ‘If you want to keep your
relationship healthy, keep it away from social media’. The secret is, the more
a relationship is secured, the more you will want to keep it private and
sacred.
By Lydia Oladejo
source: www.womenofrubies.com
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